The point is that it is really important to find time to reconnect. Dare I refer to Sex and the City? Everyone by now has probably seen it. It struck me as I sat in the theater watching the conflict play out between working mom Miranda and her unfaithful husband Steve that every marriage is at risk of falling apart. After all, why do we have so many divorces? You really have to work at it.
The same day I went to see Sex (courtesy of my sister, by the way, who for my birthday gave me the thoughtful gift of babysitting!!!), I saw the story in the Sunday Styles section of the New York Times about two couples who wanted to spark new romance into their marriages by getting busy every day for 365 days straight. What resonated with me wasn’t their endurance. It was that they had grown so distant, they felt they actually needed to formalize sex as a project.
And of course, it’s not only physical intimacy that can suffer. Emotional closeness takes a hit, too when you are so frazzled that “Did you pick up the dry cleaning?” or “Who finished the milk?” start to qualify as conversation starters. Children take an incredible amount of energy to nurture. But perhaps this Father’s Day, it might be a great time to think about shoring up your relationship, too. When I told my husband I thought about writing about this topic he smiled and said, “Now that is getting inside the head of a man.” Talk about giving him what he really wants, right? I’ve racked my brain finding the perfect Father’s Day gift for him since we became parents.
Maybe this is the year, my present to him will hit a home run.
