Making the Case for Me-Time

You thought you knew what you were in for before you became a mom: diaper changing, finger painting, and lots of downtime spent snuggling with baby ... how hard could it be?

You didn’t have a clue. The errands. The housework. The job. The marriage. Oh, and the small matter of shaping the little life you created. You thought you’d flip through a magazine during naptime, but instead you plead with the Crib Gods for Please, five more minutes so I can finish folding the laundry. After bedtime, you collapse face-first on the pillow and dream of grocery lists and Backyardigans. Forget a day at the spa; you can’t even go to the bathroom without an audience! And you love those little monkeys to death, but your kids suck more energy than a Hummer in a traffic jam.

A smart mom knows that she needs to take care of herself or the S.S. Family starts to sink. It’s just hard to make it happen, since she’s inclined to put everyone else’s needs before her own. But the more mom can stay disciplined about her self-care, the more her family will thrive. So here are a few tips that might help you add some more Me-Time to your mommy life.

The Value of a Time-Out
Mom: “I have sooo much to do, I don’t have time for a break!” Resting seems counter-productive, right? True, watching Top Chef isn’t going to get your bills paid, but it might help you do it better and quicker. A study conducted by the Families and Work Institute found that a mom’s hectic lifestyle—moving quickly from task to task, working overtime, all the time—actually causes us to make more mistakes and spend our time less efficiently. This is because moms aren’t wired like the Energizer Bunny; we need to take restorative breaks to keep going (and going and going). When we allow ourselves some rest, the results are undeniable: we’re calmer, happier parents, we have more energy, and we’re more productive. Once you make the connection between self-care and heightened performance, you’ll never look at a TV break the same way again.

Me-Time Is in the Eye of the Beholder
Mom: “Relaxing just bores me ... I like to get up and move!” When we think of Me-time, the usual clichés come to mind—the bath, the massage, the Ben and Jerry’s—but Me-time is as individual as the mom who needs it. The trick is to use your Me-time in whatever way energizes and restores you. For some moms it’s connecting with girlfriends; for others it’s kickboxing. Some volunteer, some continue their education, and some have dinner for one at their favorite restaurant. One mom’s passion is another mom’s drudgery, so find the thing that brings you the most joy in the moment (even if that thing is a nap!), and that’s your prescription for truly restorative Me-time.